the 15th christmas of renee laci

WOW! it's Christmas already! That was fast!! I wish everyone a good time and other holidays that they celebrate during this time! now... for a picture to show my Christmas Eve attire~

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the excited friday of renee laci

YUSH! I've waited for this day for 5 months now and it has FINALLY came~ The Friday before Christmas Break. I'm finally free from some school work for 2 weeks!! Though home is not the best place either... =^= I would rather say at school for the whole 2 weeks but oh well. I decked out with my Texas colors today (except for my santa hat. > u o) I bought this Texas jacket that was going to be a gift and it turned out that it would be kinda too small to give and it barely fits on me... So I had to keep this $15 DOLLAR jacket. I think that is not cheap. > ^ < My side bangs are curly (amahale style <3) and just got it pressed. I don't want a perm. I might go natural when I move out because I'm tired of wasting money on perms, hot combs, etc. Yes I am black. ^^ I'm glad my hair ain;t bald like my mother's... Her hair was GORGEOUS when she was 18, she was also gorgeous herself. Now she's all... =^= ngh... Though I would like to recreate that picture with myself, the jumpsuit, golden necklace and everything. ^ u ^ I think that would be cool. My hair 's a bit longer but I can deal. I wonder if I could go to my brother's house today. I don't want to stay at home and be with my mom and her husband all day.
I can't wait to get my presents tomorrow, on Christmas, and from sissy(my close friend). I really REALLY don't know why my Christmas list was filled with CLOTHES. That never happened before. I asked for two games this year. TWO. You know how surprising that is?! Sis said it wasn't really. I think she thinks I'm all girly. I'm not sure. I guess. My mom was surprised. My brother and sissy and may be my sister will surprise me as well. I'm not sure what my friends would get me but the best present I got so far was these chocolates pasteries. It was a secret recipe thing so I can't recreate it. ;^; I got candy but those pasteries where the BEST. ^ u ^ I still need to draw some Christmas presents myself and may make one for the udoli website. Well this I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Go drink some "Apple Cider"! > u <

the test filled day of renee laci

Today was full of tests. I looked at my PSAT scores and almost fainted. They were horrible in the Critical Reading Section. I hate reading stuff that I don't like want to read. I don't read enough. Too much homeowork for the break. My brain is going to explode. >A< I still hate it at home and will always. My mom complains and talks too much agruing with both of my sisters and myself. I don't like the drama that she is causing and it's bringing me stress from being in it. UGH... I wonder what would happen if I went to a adoption agency. I wonder that when I was little.
-tori

the abrupt wednesday of renee laci

My mood only picked just a little... Thank you, you know who you are. ^^ 5th period was fun. I learned a new word today though I just forgot what it was. They won't tell me what it meant though... ;A; they said my mind is too pure...
I was a little more socialable today which is a plus. And I found out that this guy I want to talk to (not a crush nonono!!! > A < ) Was next door to me for 5th period... So he's going to the Computer Arts too! > u o At my school we have career paths we follow like Medical, Culinary Arts, Computer Arts, etc. And I picked Graphic Arts which goes with Computer Arts. So... I might have a class with him next year if he has Graphic Arts. Other then that, I'm hungry. This will be my last Chick-fa-la sandwich from school. Today is the last day for us to sell them since the Java Cafe is taking over. >A< Their prices are so high...
I can't wait for Christmas. Somehow I think that I will have the christmas presents that I REALLY want that are not material thin~gs, but people though those hopes are sometimes popped by a needles by the causes why I cannot get them...I passed my Spanish Test~ yay~ and my day is coming to an end. I don't like Sonic the fast food place as of today. Good Night everyone.
-tori

the state during thanksgiving break of renne laci

i stopped trying. today had it's downfalls and ups, but i stopped trying to be this girl that has everything right for her. I HATE IT!!! I hate this lifestyle... I'm a girl who wishes to be a shoujo manga who always gets the love of her life and a friend that will stay with her to the end. I want that so I could get away from this mess! this hell!! ...I'm weak. This won't be read anyway.
Today I found a manga named, Koko ni Iru  Yo! People do not notice the girl except this one boy named Hinata. The girl Hikage is amazed that this boy confesses to her, a girl that is never noticed. I'm noticed.... just not for who I am really. When I express my feelings I call it complaining... I need to be tougher then this. But sometimes I want to cry too. Like now. Suicide is only a complaint. It's nothing to consider. Though I want better things for myself. I just wish my home wasn't the place I didn't want  to be.... I don't... want to be like this forever.
-tori